Q & A about Therapy
What is the difference between counseling, therapy, pastoral counseling and psychotherapy?
These are all different words that describe the same activity. There are no significant differences in the activities of these describing words. The difference might be in an approach a counselor or therapist might take. This will often reflect the therapist’s training, background or interest in how he or she does the work of therapy. You have the right to ask your therapist or counselor about their approach to the work they do…and it is probably a good idea to do so.
How do I know if I should seek counseling?
Life happens, and in the midst of its happening changes take place. When changes take place it is often in the context of relationships of family, partnership, work or other experiences where you value your life and your involvement in it. If you find yourself in a difficult place and don’t quite know how you got there or how to get out of it, counseling can help. If life has been unfair, causing an unexpected loss, your equilibrium is upset and so is your appetite and sleeping habits, counseling can help. If you find that you are thinking about things you thought you had put out of your mind a long time ago; or you find you are re-living experiences you thought you had dealt with in the past, counseling can help.
Counseling can help you find the skills and support to help you deal with a wide array of life’s challenges. You don’t have to face them by yourself. Help is available.
What happens in counseling? How often does it happen? How long does it take?
Counseling sessions allow people to talk about deeply personal concerns in the safety of a counseling office. Your privacy and confidentiality is protected by State Law. The legislative intent of confidentiality laws is to provide a place where people can “bare their souls” without the threat of public exposure. A strong working alliance with your therapist will help facilitate a comfortable place to approach difficult experiences and help you learn to deal with them creatively. Couples and families usually find they can communicate more openly in counseling.
Sessions usually last 50-60 minutes, except for the first session which is 90 minutes. This is time that is needed to establish the working relationship. At the beginning it is helpful to establish the rhythm that having weekly sessions provides…to think about and practice newly developed skills in days between sessions. I often say that the hourly session is “counseling,” the time between sessions is when “therapy” takes place. Toward the end of counseling it is often possible to meet less often, allowing more time for thoughtful practice and to help establish new patterns that will be in place instead of coming to counseling. There may be times when a person is in crisis, then it makes sense to meet more than once a week. Although there are exceptions, I have found that most people can make the desired changes within 8-15 counseling sessions. Counseling is not forever!!
What if my partner or other family members don’t want to join me in counseling?
Although sought-after changes may happen more quickly if families or couples work together in counseling, you can make many of the same changes yourself that will often affect how others will relate to you in your relationship or family…and in that way it is possible for everyone to be helped by what you decide to do for yourself. I am always interested in working with the most willing person in the relationship and leave it open for partners or other family members to join when they are ready. Sometimes others are just plain curious about what is happening to you, especially if they see the good changes that are happening to you.
What kinds of things can I expect from counseling?
You can expect counseling to help you in direct proportion to the amount of involvement and practice you give to it. It is not uncommon for people to report that what they receive far exceeds what they expected to receive. This is usually due to a vision of one’s self that was never given permission to emerge. To some this transformation is literally life-changing. Most people can expect benefits from counseling to offer:
- Less conflict and better communication in their relationship.
- Better management of anxiety and stress.
- Better management of anger and depression.
- Improved feelings of self worth.
- More meaningful and intimate couple relationship.
- Improved parenting skills.
- Resolution of conflicts that produce unwanted symptoms.
- Freedom from addictions and ability to deal with an addicted loved one.
- The option of framing your therapy as part of your spiritual journey…seeking to strengthen the center of your personally held faith.
Is counseling confidential?
State law protects the confidentiality of nearly all communication between a client and counselor. Exceptions are made only when issues of personal or public safety are at stake. When the safety of persons can be jeopardized if confidences are maintained, state laws and prudent practices require a counselor to take necessary steps to protect everyone involved.
Mr. David Eekhoff can be seen at: http://Therapists.PsychologyToday.com/rms/62353
